Well, let's set the record straight. The rumors are true. My last semester on BYU campus has commenced. I've been to almost every class once and have started mapping out what this semester is going to look like. As it turns out, I'm having some emotions about it. So, without further ado and in no particular order, here they are:
Anxiety about writing a 25-page research paper for my History 490 class (Senior thesis...ugh...). I'm sure I'll probably be complaining about this throughout the course of the semester so allow me to apologize in advance. Sorry.
Hesitation about having the same teacher for two really hard history classes. With just one class, I can sometimes fool them. With two right in a row, he's bound to figure out I don't know how to write a research paper.
Excitement that I get to study a lot about Italy this semester. Right now all I know is Venice and Pizza. This may lead to a mandatory educational journey to that beautiful land sometime soon to really make sure I've got it all down...
Anticipation for the day I get to start teaching in a real classroom. We begin our practicum in 6 weeks (observing and teaching in a classroom setting) to prepare us for our student teaching which is only FOUR SHORT MONTHS AWAY! Seriously, in preparation for our practicum our teacher today was discussing why history matters and how we can show that to our students and my heart just started pounding with excitement. I'm scared, but I really can't wait!
Nervous Joy at the thought of doing that student teaching in Washington D.C! I started filling out the application today and it's going to take a big leap of faith if it's what I really decide to do. But if I do...wow.
Fear when I think about how I'm going to be able to find the time to observe SEVENTY-FIVE HOURS in a classroom with ESL students (while also taking 19 credit hours and working 20 hours a week).
This last one might be the most surprising of all...
Sadness that it's ending and Gratitude that it happened. You'd think after 6 years of FULL-TIME school here (not counting the mission) I'd be ready to leave. Truthfully, parts of me are but I was looking today through a bunch of classes that I still really want to take that I'll never be able to. I've had access to hundreds of amazing classes taught by masters in the subject area. Even after the amazing experiences I've had, I still feel like I've missed out on so many more fascinating classes I could have taken. Weird? Yes. Unexpected? Yes.
So there you have it. I can honestly say that my outlook on this semester has made me both more EXCITED and more TERRIFIED than any that have come before.
Bring it on.
5 years ago